This is what I do, don't try to understand how I do it; I don't really know either

Archive for February, 2015

What if it never comes…

I have come to really love adventure. I don’t wait for it to come to me, I go and discover it. As a single mom of four young kids, this is not always easy.I am wrapping up the first of five weeks away from home, in a foreign country with my traveling fan club. I am exhausted. I have dealt with more spills than I can count, whining like never before, a child unexpectedly walking into the deep end of a pool, pee and poo and of course many others too numerous to list.

After my second lie down of the day, giving my kids electronic babysitters on their beds, I grabbed a shower and I thought – what the heck am I doing? The thought lasted 30 seconds, if that. As worn out as I am, I remembered my brother. His birthday was yesterday and he died before he was 40 in an accident. I have lots many other friends long before I think they should have gone. And that’s why the thought only lasted as long as it did.

It’s super hard to do what I do right now. Work, school, kids – its a super crazy balancing act. But I do it because I have a fear. I fear that if I wait until life gets “easier,” then it never will. I will come to the end and go hey wait a minute – when was the time I was supposed to do all that cool stuff? If it ever does get easier, GREAT and we will do amazing things and maybe I wont be tired all the time, but for now I am not waiting. Because I have seen too often that easier may never come and I refuse to let life slip through my hands while I can hold it.

Do hard things, because they are worth it.

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